A man was on trial for robbing a convenience store. He didn't like the job his attorney was doing, so he fired him and represented himself. He was doing a fine job until the manager of the store got to the stand. When she identified him as the robber, he jumped up and yelled, "You're lying! I should have blown your head off!!" He paused, then added, "If I had been the one that was there."
It took the jury only twenty minutes to find him guilty. He was sentenced to thirty years.
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